Choosing LA

Hey. *casts eyes downward, sheepishly* Are blogs still a thing? A generation may as well have passed since I last wrote, and yet here I find myself, at Panera.  Kids are at home with our new summer sitter. In Los Angeles. Well, the Valley, if you wanna get all technical about it.  Last June, J … Continue reading →

Heart-Heavy

My heart is so heavy. There are good days.  The days it doesn’t feel crushing; the days I write my to-do list in my planner and bullet journal, and brainstorm on my white board, and tackle all the tasks, and wipe the counters, and make the lunches the night before.  We laugh.  We are so … Continue reading →

On Grief and Health

Here is what I have learned about grief thus far. It’s unpredictable.  Unruly.  Some days you will feel joy as normal; others you will experience a profound sadness that you cannot shake.  Those days you may find yourself shedding lots of tears, or making a cup of coffee and settling into the couch with a stack … Continue reading →

Journaling

I’m sure I’ve mentioned that I have been keeping a journal since I was eight years old.  Recently, I’ve been combing through these treasured books for anything about my mom.  And of course, all of the delicious bits of melodrama and unintentional comedy that come from being ages 12 through 14. EXHIBIT A: Of course … Continue reading →

Choosing My Way

I’ve been gradually trying to return to health, both physical and mental.  I’ve set a goal for myself to read 25 books this year, and I’m currently working to finish the first in preparation for book club this evening. It’s Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl, a very timely pick.  I just came across … Continue reading →

Broken.

On Tuesday, December 15th, at about 6 PM, my mom died.  She was 60 years old. I had told you she was sick.  She’d been diagnosed a year ago with CMML, a strange, extremely rare blood cancer that was supposed to be manageable for years.  It was supposed to be cured by a bone marrow … Continue reading →

That Time The Bees Attacked.

I feel like my head is very, very full these days.  There is so much I need to do, so much I should be doing.  So many books I am reading and want to read.  A project I am working on with a friend that I want desperately to come to fruition, but I’m a … Continue reading →

Natural Born Athlete

I was never very athletic. In retrospect, I wonder if this wasn’t part of parental conditioning. I was a clumsy and whimsical child.  When I am encouraged to recall what I loved to do as a kid to ascertain what I am meant to be doing today, it involves lots of paper and notebooks and … Continue reading →

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.

Lots of people tell me I look great.  That sounds strange to write; but it’s usually when I mention I still have 20 pounds of baby weight to lose, people will shrug this off with a wave of a hand and a loving eyeroll: “I think you look great!  She’s what?  Two months old?” While I … Continue reading →